I want to share some things I’ve learned about creating a strong relationship. We’ve all heard the advice: communicate, compromise, and help each other. But sometimes, it can be hard to apply this in practice! Here are some ways that might work better:
Ask some Dirty Questions
You’ll be surprised at the answers you get. When you ask someone, “What do you want to do with your life?” they’re likely to say, “I dunno, I just want to make a lot of money!” But if they don’t know what they’re doing with their lives, how will they make lots and lots of money? If a person doesn’t have goals and ambitions—if they’re not on a path toward something—it’s impossible for them to succeed in any area of life.
Maybe you don’t want anything from this relationship other than friendship (which is fine!). Or maybe you do want something more serious from the person; either way, asking these questions will help get things started on the right foot so that when it comes time for those bigger conversations down the road (like marriage), both parties will feel comfortable talking about what really matters most: themselves. After all, we all need someone who understands us intimately before committing our hearts fully to theirs! You can check Twinfluence.com for some dirty questions.
Keep the good things going
In addition to opening the lines of communication and keeping an eye on each other’s needs, couples need to keep the good things going.
This means nurturing your relationship and not letting it become stale or boring. You can do this by making time for one another and being creative with your activities. If you are feeling particularly inspired, try out some new ways of expressing your love for each other! Try writing a poem together or taking a dance class. It doesn’t have to be expensive; just doing something that brings joy into your lives will work wonders in maintaining and strengthening your bond as a couple.
If things seem strained or tense between you two later, take stock of what has changed over the past few months since last Valentine’s Day (or whatever holiday has passed since then). Are there any big life changes—a new job for either person? A move away from home? These kinds of events can definitely cause stress when coupled with daily life pressures such as money worries or health concerns—but acknowledging these stresses early on, instead of letting them build up into resentment toward each other, may help prevent bigger problems down the road (such as divorce).
Speak up when something bothers you.
When you want something, don’t be afraid to ask for it. You’re not a child, so it’s okay to make requests. And if your partner gives you the silent treatment or sulks after you’ve made a request, that’s not a good sign. If they can’t handle being asked for what you need from them, that will not work in the long term.
Another way this is important is when something bothers you about your partner. We all have our flaws and imperfections—that should be expected in any relationship. Still, if things about your partner bother you and interfere with your happiness as a couple, then it might be time for some honest talk (and maybe even an exit).
Make regular time for yourself or with friends and family outside your relationship.
You need to make time for yourself, and you need to make time for the people you love. This may include spending time with a best friend or taking your partner out on a date. It’s also important to have alone time to relax and reflect on things going on in your life. If you don’t take care of yourself first, it’s hard to take care of others (or anyone). You should never feel guilty about taking time off from your relationship—it only strengthens it!
Make space for your partner to be with their friends and family too
It is important to have separate friends and family. Your partner should be able to connect with their own network of people who will support them in ways you cannot. However, creating the space needed for this to happen can be difficult.
Schedule time away from each other: This could mean setting aside a night every week where you spend time alone with your friends or family members or making sure that each person has some time alone at home during the day when they aren’t working or spending time together as a couple.
This also includes not putting pressure on one another about how often (or how little) you see other people outside of your relationship—there isn’t an “ideal” frequency for how much time each partner spends apart! You just need enough separation so that neither of your relationships suffer due to neglect—and if anyone feels like they’re being abandoned because they don’t feel their partner understands their needs well enough, then that’s something worth addressing immediately!
Trust that you can have a strong relationship without being attached at the hip.
One of the most important things you can do to create a strong relationship is to trust that you can have both. Trust that your partner will still love and respect you when they’re away from you. Trust that there are no strings attached to their love—it depends on how often or where they see each other.
Trust yourself too: if something has been bothering you for a while, share it with them! If one of your friends is making comments about how much time he/she spends with his/her partner and how it’s making him/her jealous, remind him/her that this isn’t true. You don’t need to break up because someone says something mean about your relationship; instead, stick together and let them know why their comment was wrong!
Respond instead of reacting
If there’s one piece of advice that can change your life, it’s this: respond instead of react.
It’s a simple concept, but one that most people don’t put into practice. Reacting is automatic—it’s hard-wired into our brains to respond in certain ways to specific stimuli—and it often leads us to make decisions we later regret. Responding, on the other hand, is a conscious choice you make after analyzing all the available information and determining what your best course of action will be. This requires knowledge, self-awareness, and forethought—all things that strengthen your relationships with others as well as yourself!
Here are some examples of responding versus reacting:
Pick your battles
- Pick your battles.
- Know what is important to you, and be okay with what isn’t.
- This applies to everything from your partner to friends and family members. You are not responsible for changing everyone around you—and it’s much easier if you don’t try!
It’s the same with yourself: let go of those things that aren’t worth the energy involved in fighting them.
Find joy in being together and in doing things apart.
Don’t try to keep your partner from doing anything they want to do.
This seems like a simple rule, but it’s important and not always easy to follow. It’s tempting to control other people, especially those we love so much! But it may be hard for them—and for you—to feel close if they don’t have the freedom they need in their own lives. The best relationships are based on trust and respect, which means letting people decide how they want to live their lives and building friendships outside of your relationship.
Value what the other person brings to the table.
One of the best ways to nurture a strong relationship is to focus on the things you appreciate about your partner. Acknowledging what they bring to the table will help you get more out of your relationship and strengthen it. When looking at all the positive aspects of your partnership, there are many things to consider.
When we’re in relationships with people who are important to us, it’s easy for us to place their needs above our own—and that’s not always a bad thing! But sometimes we can get so wrapped up in making sure our partner is happy that we forget about ourselves and what makes us feel good.
It helps if you take time for yourself every once in a while; spend some time just doing something that brings joy into your life without worrying about anyone else. You’ll come back refreshed and ready to be part of something bigger than yourself!
There are many ways to create a strong relationship that works for both of you.
So, how can you create a relationship that works for both of you? Well, the first thing is to understand what makes each person who they are and their strengths and weaknesses. Then, it’s important to value what the other person brings to the table regarding skills and personal traits.
Then there’s compromise—being willing to give-and-take when working together on chores or financial planning. Finally, honesty with yourself and your partner is key: no one should be afraid of admitting when they’ve made mistakes, nor should they be afraid of being open about how they feel in any given situation.
In addition (and perhaps most importantly), try not to take things personally or assume that your partner has bad intentions when something goes wrong—you may just need more time together before figuring out how to best move forward!
We hope these tips have given you some ideas for creating a stronger and happier relationship with your partner. Remember, it’s not about doing everything on this list—but if you can find one or two things that work for you, it could make all the difference in your relationship!